Three hoodies save the world

Constant moaning and whinging about everything

Archive for the month “November, 2014”

Finally done it!!!!!!

Geezersback21

Whayheeeeeeey!

I’ve finally done it. Old Geezers 2 is finished. After eighteen edits I’m confident that I’ve eradicated every mistake. I also think it’s the best thing I’ve ever written and hopefully I’ll be saying the same thing about The Book of Pain when I finally finish editing that.

Now all I have to do is format it for Amazon and Smashwords. It’s a pity I can’t give away Geezers 1 to give people a taste but Amazon won’t let me as I only have a month to go with them and cannot give away anything. But as soon as I get back to Smashwords I will give the first away to tempt people.

I’m not going to do the Createspace thing. It’s such a colossal pain and I never sold enough to make it worthwhile.

I wish I was as complacent about the cover, but as I can’t pay anyone else to do it, I hope the writing will speak for itself.

Finally!!!!!!!!

Just whining for the sake of it.

As another of the probably unlimited presents I’ll be giving my offspring for Christmas, I put her new cat on the insurance today. I’ll probably need it since I discovered two headless rats placed politely outside the back door this morning. When she finds them she’s going to go bonkers.

And another thing; I’ve never really been interested in Halloween, just writing off as something we knicked from those people over the water. Something I can’t write off, as I nearly got slaughtered yesterday in Camden High Street for the heinous crime of just walking down the road, is Black Friday. Thank you all so much. I realise that it’s just a way for the retailers to make up for a really awful year but after nearly being flattened by a flying sixty inch flat screen, interrogated by a furious pensioner as to whether I’d stolen her giant turkey, despite being empty handed, and finally crushed by fifty people stampeding into a department store whose web site had succumbed to all the traffic, I think you can take it back – please.

And another thing. In disgust with me for quitting the net provider I’ve stuck with through, (no there was no thick) but thin, for eight years, they’ve reduced my speed to about five KB per hour for the final three days. I got more from my first 14/4 dial up modem about three hundred years ago. If the speed from my new one isn’t any better I’m going to scream and scream until I’m sick.

I’m so mean and horrible – apparently

‘I keeel you.’

I don’t know why my daughter insists on talking to and threatening me in a Mexican accent – she was born and brought up in London.

Apparently I’m to be keeeeeled because I cannot come up with a reasonable solution to the unfathomable question of why my daughter’s antichrist pony is unhappy. Admittedly it has Cushings disease and Laminitis, either of which would bring me down a bit if I suffered from same. Although, as I don’t have hooves, the second seems a little less likely. And his attitude about being half an inch too short to be an actual horse had always made him a pain, although I’m not too sure he knows about that and is just an annoying git for the sake of it.

‘So why can’t you stay with him all night, just to cheer him up. There’s straw all over the floor, it’s warm and dry and it’s a big stable. You’re just being mean.’

If not wanting to spend the night with an animal who hates me – even after giving him daily treats is being mean, then so be it. And I certainly have no intention of spending the night cooped up in a box with a horse which sleeps on its back with its legs wide apart and whose flatulence can strip paint.

Will Santa bring me some new fingertips.

I’ve just finished the penultimate edit of Geezers 2. I’ll begin the next immediately because I want to get it up by Christmas – so to speak.

I was hoping to have two ready but as things never go to plan I’m lucky this one’s even close. I may have mentioned this before; in fact I know I’ve droned on about it ad-nauseum, but I never cease to be amazed at just how I can miss so many errors no matter how many times I go through the book. But finally I think it’s right.

And luckily my brief tenure to Amazon is almost at an end. Ever since I temporarily sold my soul to them a few months ago I’ve only sold one book. That might very well be because my writing is rubbish but I prefer to believe that my novels are buried beneath the tottering mountain of other works they’ve received from people like myself or copied from out of copyright collections. Whatever, soon I’ll be back to Smashwords, Nook, iTunes, and all those other outlets I can barely remember. They didn’t pay my bills but at least a trickle of sales always made me happy.

In a few days I’ll be putting links to all the novels in my favourites section. Christmas is coming and all those books are well worth a read, and I believe they’re all at a very good price for the festive period. And if anyone else wants me to publicise theirs at the same time, fell free to send me your links. I may have to do it in several posts but it’s no problem.

Writer Wednesday

Great interview and great books.

creative barbwire (or the many lives of a creator)

My name is Brenda de Zorig and I’m a journalist for the Konigtown Gazette. I’ve been on the road for years as an actress in an itinerant company, but eventually decided to go back to my hometown to start living of the thing I like the most – writing. So while I write my Masterpiece, I took this job at the Gazette and they send me on various assignments… I thought I might as well starting interviewing random people. Since I intend to write fiction, but truth is always stranger than fiction, I’m eager to hear about people out there – on my world or beyond.

So, here we are again with women in breeches! Hello there. Tell me a little about yourself.

1-katelinaMy name is Katelina Mauldin and I’m almost twenty-six. I guess the most interesting thing about me isn’t really me, but the company I keep. I’m…

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Happy Holidays with Poetry by Bonnie Mutchler

Amaranthine by Joleene Naylor

holiday sales

Yes, it’s time to start finding gifts for friends and families. Why not make it easy this year? Like myself, DM Yates will be posting great bargains, and in the spirit of the holidays I thought I’d share!

From DM Yate’s blog:

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Happy Holidays Week Two

Keeping up with my list of books for holiday gifts, this week I showcase poetry books. Last week, I pointed out two individuals for book covers and suggested how unique this gift would be for that special author or small business owner. You can click on my older posts to read those.

All this week I will be promoting poetry by Indie Authors. I have often said that my heart belongs to writing but my soul belongs to poetry.

Poetry is not as popular as in past times but there are still plenty of modern-day skilled poets, and there are many who enjoy…

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I’ve just committed literary murder.

Oh, you’ve been writing again, I hear you say.

No it’s worse than that. The rule I’ve read about a hundred times, and indeed always tried to practice came back to haunt me today.

Old Geezers 2 is not my first novel. In fact, if I include those I’ve either lost or thrown away in disgust, I’ve written fourteen. Every one of them required editing as I’m not one of those (are there any?) writers who can create a great novel at the first sitting.

The lesson mentioned earlier was, as we all know: if it isn’t relevant – then get rid of it.

A case in point. Chapter 9. It’s a long chapter and covers a lot of ground, mostly as a way of bringing the reader up to speed and also to remind him/her of what happened in the previous novel. I spent a lot of time writing it and throughout four previous edits mainly corrected typing, punctuation and spelling errors. But last night I finished it again and realised that it was simply too long, too convoluted and too confusing, though not for me because I’d written it, and the previous novel.

So today I began again. First I highlighted in red the absolutely essential paragraphs and then read the remaining on its own, and to my horror realised that nearly four pages were just me indulging myself and showing just how ingenious I was when it came to paradoxes – an essential element in my SF novels.

Do it, I commanded myself. But no, surely I can keep it but perhaps just leave out the occasional comma. It took nearly two hours but finally I deleted all but what was strictly necessary, cringing at every squeal as my words succumbed to the delete button. My babies, my carefully thought out words were all gone. It’s not as if I can even save them for another novel.

It’s been a hard lesson, and I know the novel will be better for it but all those words sent to oblivion are going to make my night painfully long.

Intruder alert!!

My wonderful beta reader sent back my latest version of Old Geezers 2 this week. Her reaction to the book was largely favourable which thrilled me, especially as I’ve taken great effort to remove my own most common errors, ie “That, Which and Had: all that passive rubbish.

You might want to check your usage of the word “now”, she said.

So I did, and to my horror M/S Word glibly informed that it occurred 892 times in my manuscript. Now, I like now as you can see but had not realised just how much I liked it. Further research revealed that good old M/S had also included “know” and “knowing” in the results but that was still a very big number. Removing 90% of them was relatively easy, but to see just how far the infection has invaded my system I performed a search of my new novel, The Book of Pain – 1136 instances. And even allowing for know and knowing, what I’d assumed to be the final edit in a few weeks is apparently not going to be.

I’m going to check both Geezers and B/o/Pain for other intruders. I’m not looking forward to the results.

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