Three Hoodies Save the World

Constant moaning and whinging about everything

Archive for the month “August, 2017”

It’s finally finished.

Sod’s Law is finally rit.

When I say finished, what I mean is that the first draft is finished. It’s only 85k words which is a little light for me but no doubt as I start filling in details on the edits it’ll flesh out a bit.

As I predicted and like always when I write a new novel the end is slightly different from how I envisioned it, but I think it’s better this way.

Now I’ll take a few weeks off then begin the first of the countless rewrites when it might completely change again.

I’m still not entirely sure about the cover. Some people might think it’s a bit rude, and even with that it’s a little spartan. Now that I’ve got time to play with my new painting program I might just add something to it. Dunno. For now I’m just happy that it’s done.

With luck I hope to publish it in about six months.

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Someone’s digging a hole under my house.

For the last ten years I’ve been popping into the local Virgin media shop every few months and asking/pleading for them to cable my house. And every time they’ve said no.

My current service provider gives me about 40Mb broadband, which sounds good, and would be were there not fifty trillion children living in my general area. All of which means, that come the end of school, or at any time over the weekend I’m down to dial up speed and that’s despite having fibre broadband.

Fifteen years ago I thought a 14. 4 dial up speed was pretty good. It only took me three hours to download Netscape Navigator (that’s an old browser) and a measly six hours to download an 8 bit game which kept me amused for almost a week. But as soon as broadband came along my life was complete.

That was before I moved into current house which is as far as it can physically be from the farthest node, which in turn is as far as is physically able to be from the farthest exchange.

So you can imagine my thrill(ment) today when I returned from work to find an enormous great trench down my street and twenty men with enormous drills making it even wider and deeper as I watched. Could it be, I mused before rushing upstairs and waiting to find Virgin media on my clockwork speed internet connection. Then armed with their number I finally spoke to them.

“Yes,” the man said. “We are indeed cabling your street.” My paroxysms of joy almost caused me to drop the phone into my mug of cold tea. “And,” he continued happly, “in less than eighteen months we can wire you up.”

18 months? I just turned sixty. I might be dead by then!!!!!

Blogophilia 27.10 Fallon Part 3

It gets better and better.

It’s time again for Blogophilia, the fun group where martien gives participants prompts to use in their weekly blog. This week’s prompts are:

Ecrits Blogophilia Week 27.10 Topic – Sometimes I Wish…
**BONUSES:
Bonus: Hard (2 pts) Include a lyric from a U2 song
Easy (1 pt) Incorporate the word “diaphanous”

And so we are ending Fallon. Considering I had no plan for this story at the very beginning, I am shocked to see how long it ended up in total. Yeesh. Next week should be Franklin’s turn, unless I skip ahead and write Griselda instead.

******

Belle was easier to persuade than Fallon thought she’d be, and soon they were packed into her ’54 Hudson Hornet and headed down the dark highway. Somehow the hulking vehicle, a remnant of Lara’s favorite era, seemed the perfect choice to rescue her in.

“Thanks again,” Fallon said from the roomy backseat.

Belle…

View original post 3,314 more words

At first I thought she was dead.

For such a mobile little animal Ellie really can sleep.

But when she’s awake she’s a monster. Here’s a video of her exercising the older horse. We don’t let her share the same field in case she eats Ritchie, who’s got the brain of a retarded slug. The one that nearly killed my daughter is now living in a field with three other un-rideable nags and having the time of its life.

And here’s the other cat, Harley, also dead until it hears the sound of it’s bowl being filled.

I wish I could sleep like that. If so much a moth flutters by in the next county I’m awake instantly.

Twenty six pages in one day.

Thirty pages in two days. That’s an awful lot of writing for me but I’m enthused since people are dying off in a satisfactory manner and the plots nears it’s end. With good sailing (of the metaphorical kind) the first draft should be finished by the end of the week. Then I’m going to take a couple of weeks off before beginning the first edit. Although that might be just a bit longer since the stylus pen arrived for my android tablet today and as I’ve already downloaded and paid for ArtRage for tablet I think I’ll have a little play.

I’ve just begun learning about pastels and the first attempt ever to paint a dog has been a bit of a disaster. It’s looks like a Quatermass experiment gone wrong. You’d have to be as old as me to understand that but what I really mean is that it’s rubbish. I know some people spend their entire artistic lives painting people, or pets or landscapes and do nothing else but I feel like I should expand my limited horizons even though I’ve always loved landscape because I can invent places that never existed before. Like this place:

glade3

One of my faves.

I’ll give it a few more weeks before realising that one cannot begin a completely new discipline and perfect it in a fortnight, and then just go back to landscapes. Until then I’ll just have fun.

The writer’s back finally.

You may have noticed that I haven’t been talking much about writing for a week or two. That’s because I forgot how to be one. For over three weeks my newest creation has been floundering because I didn’t know where to go. It’s odd because I know exactly how it will end. I just didn’t know how to get there.

But finally I’m back. I simply decided to write the last third of the book from a new place. I’ll just splice the two parts together in the many edits to follow.

It’s good to be back.

Alas the same cannot be said for my hero, Arnold Pratt, who’s about to fall victim to his worst enemy.

    ‘Get on with it. You were a man once.’ His words echoed mockingly from the tunnel below as he slowly, fearfully lowered his other foot onto the rung, grasping the steel rails as hard as his mud covered hands would allow, before feeling carefully down for the next. Maybe there weren’t two. Maybe there was only a few feet down to the bottom of wherever it went. But it wasn’t to be that easy. By the time he’d ordered his heart to quit its hammering he was down to the third rung, his head almost level with the ground. If there was much more then sod this for a game of soldiers. He was leaving and getting far away from here. 

But that was Arnold’s final rational thought, for approximately five seconds after his trembling foot found the next rung a slight sensation in his ears alerted him to two things. The first was a sound, then a waft of displaced air just before an almighty thump on his head dislodged him from the ladder. He didn’t know that because he was unconscious, and falling.

I found something else to do this week

There are about, well I don’t know, probably an infinite number of variations to the tools in ArtRage, and that’s what I’ve been discovering this week.

This is my first ever painting, which as you can see has hardly begun and is complete rubbish. It looks better if you don’t enlarge it.

I’m doing it in oil which is incredibly difficult. I’d like to meet those people who post such effortless speed painting demos on YouTube and strangle them for being so smooth, or shake their hands for putting so much effort into being good. And I thought GIMP was hard.

I will not be beaten. As soon as I’ve finished what I believe to be a passable painting, I’m going to begin all over again and learn water colour art. Can’t wait. There’s a version for android. You can guess what I’m going to get next.

Needless to say I haven’t got much writing; well any writing done this week. That can wait for a while. I’m enchanted with this new art package and will have so much fun.

I decided to do something creative despite being old

As I’m still relatively healthy despite my advanced age, I decided to do something I’ve been thinking about for a while.

It’s been a long time since I was a Royal Marine Commando and despite working out every day for over forty years I can no longer claim to be as fit as I was as a teenager. I know that I couldn’t climb up the side of a mountain with well over a hundred pounds on my back, and a damn heavy machine gun, and enough ammunition to begin, and probably end my own little war. But I am still reasonably fit. So I stopped smoking. It’s been hard, although not as hard as I’d imagined.

So to celebrate my new found wealth since a packet of ciggs in the UK costs about a million quid a packet, in just one week I’ve saved enough money to buy something I’ve been wanting for ages but couldn’t really justify.

I bought ArtRage 5

I know what it can do and I’ve been watching all kinds of tutorials on the net which has given me a pretty good idea how to begin. it doesn’t have all the fancy tools of GIMP which I’ve had for years, or the fancy tools of Photoshop which I can’t afford and wouldn’t even if I could. But at least I get to try and have some fun at the same time.

I’ve finished the cover for my new novel so I won’t do it with ArtRage, but there’s plenty of books left in these elderly fingers. Thus my next cover will be with that; perhaps an oil painting (he said, getting well ahead of himself as usual).

It’s Coming….

It’s time to face up to it.

On the eve of my fortieth birthday I spoke to my family, and in a friendly tone suggested that if they so much as mentioned my age on the morrow they would both die in horrible pain. Next day I was a grumpy old git and spent most of it on my own. Thereafter I was fine.

Last week I received a circular from a very well known chemist’s chain reminding me that as of the 10th of August I would officially be old. But just to soften the blow they also offered me a twenty five percent discount on everything they sold plus oodles of extra points on the loyalty card which I’ve thus far used just to clean the ice off my car windscreen. The offer might have worked were it not for the implication that due to my advanced age It might be better if I didn’t dawdle on cashing in all those extra points.

I’m only sixty!!!! I don’t make Methuselah look like a spring chicken by comparison. I don’t feel any different from the ninth of August when I was merely middle aged.

The next person to ask me if I need help crossing the road is going to get the back of my hand.

Although I am going to give in to one thing. My hair grows so fast that It’s almost down to my backside in less than a month. If they offer me pensioner rates again I’m going to accept.

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