After three weeks I finally got it.
Although calling it a bike is a bit of an overstatement, really.
I then almost buggered the whole thing up by putting diesel into it while leering at a proper motorbike in the petrol station.
Compared to my own last proper bike it’s a bit girly.
I had to sell that one because my daughter (allegedly) needed a car. But then I would have had to get rid of it anyway because it was just too wide to get down the horrible road I have to travel everyday: the A40.
Don’t care. I’ve finally got the replacement for my other scooter which now has about a billion miles on the clock while I’ve been waiting. And I’ve spent an utter fortune on cables and locks. I know if they want it, then they (the scumbag thieves) will take it. I chose this one because its a newer version of the one I already have and is slow and a little boring but does get me through the traffic. So (and I’m ashamed to say this) I hope they’ll pick on someone else.